Because there are some really stupid people out there, they’ll do anything to make a good photo even better.
While you might think standing next to the water’s edge with a nice bridge in the background might be a nice snap to chuck up onto social media, one woman wanted to take it to the extreme.
So she decided to chuck a goddamn octopus on her face.
Jamie Bisceglia was taking part in a fishing derby in Washington, USA when she came across a giant Pacific octopus.
Instead of chucking it on your hand, arm or body, the American woman thought the face was the best place to put a marine animal despite not knowing whether it could do any harm.
Why you would want to put an animal that has tentacles that’s sole purpose is to suck tight onto a surface on your face is beyond us.
“It had barrelled its beak into my chin and then let go a little bit and did it again,” Bisceglia said, according to KIRO7. “It was a really intense pain when it went inside and it just bled, dripping blood for a long time.”
Now, that alone is enough to send shivers down someone’s spine, but little did Jamie realise: the octopus was venomous.
“I noticed that I could not swallow properly. My throat was swollen. The left side of my face was almost paralysed feeling,” she told KING5.
She was transported to hospital where, according to The Fresno Bee, she was treated by a doctor with an octopus tattoo.
“I didn’t know they had a beak that they can inject into you,” Bisceglia wrote on Facebook. “Well it happened to me. Ouch.”
At least she’s not as bad as the tourist that thought it was a good idea to hold one of the most venomous sea creatures in the whole ocean.
A person uploaded a video to Reddit showing them holding a blue ringed octopus in Australia and thankfully lived to show the evidence.
Of course you’re all going to say: “Well if they can handle it without getting injured, then it must not be that bad.”
To be fair, whoever held the octopus got away with their life because these creatures contain enough venom to kill up to 26 humans in just minutes.
Their bites are often painless because they’re so small, but once the venom starts to set in, the victim’s body becomes paralysed and they start to suffer respiratory depression aka their breathing slows dramatically.
So the worst part about this is that while you’re dying you’re completely conscious. You slowly stop breathing and there’s nothing you can do about it. You probably don’t even have enough time to signal for help before the effects start to kick in.